%@$#^#&$!!!!!
I feel grumpy!!!!!
I'm frustrated with household chores. The trash bag broke. I tripped over the dog. I swore at the birds that leave white streaks on my windows or worse--they fly into my windows at full force and break their little birdy necks and then I have to pick up poor dead bird bodies and dispose of them. Even the squirrel that usually entertains me has become annoying with his incessant chattering and tail flips. I wonder what those tail flips actually mean...?
We are in week 5 of the Great Social Distancing of 2020. I count our time in exile from the first day school was canceled (March 16th), which was also the day we started serving Hope's Kitchen lunches as take-out, and the day we closed the church office and started working from home. Ten days later, on March 26, the statewide stay-at-home order went into effect. After it was extended, we still have 12 days left on that stay-at-home order...and that's only if it doesn't get extended even longer.
I'm an intelligent person. I fully understand the situation we're in, and I completely support all measures to protect all of God's people from illness and harm. I get it. But just for today: I hate it! So I snap at poor innocent animals. I swear at the television news. And every once in a while I just shout something loudly, just to let some pent-up frustration out. I'm wishing I hadn't given away my punching bag that served me so well earlier in my life and career. Now THAT was a great release for frustration!
After a few deep breaths, I'm a calmer person. Reason returns to my thinking, and feelings are quieter. I guess the surprising thing is not that I have a day when frustration takes over--it's that there aren't MORE of these just-fed-up days. I'm also guessing that you're having them too. What a weird world we're living in.
"Weird." (Merriam-Webster) of strange or extraordinary character : ODD, FANTASTIC
(Cambridge English Dictionary) very strange and unusual, unexpected, or not natural.
I know I'm over-using this word these days, but for me, it describes the kind of off-balance, disoriented feeling I'm experiencing. Even the most even keel personalities among us will admit to feeling as if we've entered uncharted territory. Like when the ancient maps would indicate the end of the known world with a warning: Beyond Here Be Dragons. A warning that sailing into uncharted waters might mean you never return.
I think what's actually making me grumpy today is the realization that even when this enforced isolation time has ended...life will not go back to the way it was before. WE will not go back to being who we were before. We will have shared this collective experience, and we will be changed. More cautious, perhaps. Maybe less inclined to touch or hug. Certainly more aware of our vulnerability as individuals and as an entire world population.
Even when the stay-at-home is lifted, it may be many weeks before we are officially cleared to meet in large groups again and can return to the sanctuary to worship together. I'm grieving this reality. I'm trying to get my mind around it and decide what we can do to stay joined in heart, mind and Spirit. I will get there. Tomorrow I'll be back with the Hope's Kitchen Heroes and be inspired to just keep moving forward in faith.
It's OK to be grumpy. It's OK to grieve and be sad. It's OK to feel frustrated, lonely, happy, loving, joyous. Let's encourage each other to simply feel what we feel--and know that in spite of our external circumstances, we are still joined together in God's eternal love.
In the words of the beloved hymn Blest Be the Tie That Binds:
When we asunder part, it gives us inward pain; but we shall still be joined in heart, and hope to meet again.
Prayer Requests: Please continue your prayers for all who are working in essential services, medical services, food services; for the Navajo Nation as they fight a brutal outbreak of COVID-19; for each other as we get through all that may come with faith and love.
Peace and all good,
Pastor Jean
I'm frustrated with household chores. The trash bag broke. I tripped over the dog. I swore at the birds that leave white streaks on my windows or worse--they fly into my windows at full force and break their little birdy necks and then I have to pick up poor dead bird bodies and dispose of them. Even the squirrel that usually entertains me has become annoying with his incessant chattering and tail flips. I wonder what those tail flips actually mean...?
We are in week 5 of the Great Social Distancing of 2020. I count our time in exile from the first day school was canceled (March 16th), which was also the day we started serving Hope's Kitchen lunches as take-out, and the day we closed the church office and started working from home. Ten days later, on March 26, the statewide stay-at-home order went into effect. After it was extended, we still have 12 days left on that stay-at-home order...and that's only if it doesn't get extended even longer.
I'm an intelligent person. I fully understand the situation we're in, and I completely support all measures to protect all of God's people from illness and harm. I get it. But just for today: I hate it! So I snap at poor innocent animals. I swear at the television news. And every once in a while I just shout something loudly, just to let some pent-up frustration out. I'm wishing I hadn't given away my punching bag that served me so well earlier in my life and career. Now THAT was a great release for frustration!
After a few deep breaths, I'm a calmer person. Reason returns to my thinking, and feelings are quieter. I guess the surprising thing is not that I have a day when frustration takes over--it's that there aren't MORE of these just-fed-up days. I'm also guessing that you're having them too. What a weird world we're living in.
"Weird." (Merriam-Webster) of strange or extraordinary character : ODD, FANTASTIC
(Cambridge English Dictionary) very strange and unusual, unexpected, or not natural.
I know I'm over-using this word these days, but for me, it describes the kind of off-balance, disoriented feeling I'm experiencing. Even the most even keel personalities among us will admit to feeling as if we've entered uncharted territory. Like when the ancient maps would indicate the end of the known world with a warning: Beyond Here Be Dragons. A warning that sailing into uncharted waters might mean you never return.
I think what's actually making me grumpy today is the realization that even when this enforced isolation time has ended...life will not go back to the way it was before. WE will not go back to being who we were before. We will have shared this collective experience, and we will be changed. More cautious, perhaps. Maybe less inclined to touch or hug. Certainly more aware of our vulnerability as individuals and as an entire world population.
Even when the stay-at-home is lifted, it may be many weeks before we are officially cleared to meet in large groups again and can return to the sanctuary to worship together. I'm grieving this reality. I'm trying to get my mind around it and decide what we can do to stay joined in heart, mind and Spirit. I will get there. Tomorrow I'll be back with the Hope's Kitchen Heroes and be inspired to just keep moving forward in faith.
It's OK to be grumpy. It's OK to grieve and be sad. It's OK to feel frustrated, lonely, happy, loving, joyous. Let's encourage each other to simply feel what we feel--and know that in spite of our external circumstances, we are still joined together in God's eternal love.
In the words of the beloved hymn Blest Be the Tie That Binds:
When we asunder part, it gives us inward pain; but we shall still be joined in heart, and hope to meet again.
Prayer Requests: Please continue your prayers for all who are working in essential services, medical services, food services; for the Navajo Nation as they fight a brutal outbreak of COVID-19; for each other as we get through all that may come with faith and love.
Peace and all good,
Pastor Jean
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